crying fatties

Last week when I went to the rest room at work, I sat on the toilet and felt an itch brewing.  I lifted my shirt to itch better and found a twist tie in one of my rolls.

How fucking fat am I that I find random objects in my folds?

I thought about web camming to earn some extra money.

someone asked me why I was showing a beached whale on an adult website.

I told them showing a beached whale would cruel… and then it clicked.

So I ate some ice cream and felt bad so i threw it up… but then I wanted Ice cream again so I went back to the store and bought another pint… then I ate it all!! now I am debating if I should throw it up or not…

I thought about web camming to earn some extra money.

someone asked me why I was showing a beached whale on an adult website.

I told them showing a beached whale would cruel… and then it clicked.

been a while…

I’m eatting cake……

I love cake

The little Indian men tremble in fear when they see me coming down the street.

I think I even heard them crying in the kitchen.

I went to the indian buffet.  WHY DID I GO TO THE DAMN BUFFET?  It’s a fatties worst and greatest dream.  SO FAT!

Can’t see feet

I don’t know directions.  I was lost and the person directing told me to head south.  I replied “I don’t know which way is south”. 

Friend:  Where are you?

Me: Near the stadium

Friend:  Head to Jack in the Box

Me: Ok….on my way.

I miss my feet